When thoughts turn to death and the end of your life.

The first time you really consider your own mortality is possibly when someone you love passes on, or you have been diagnosed with a disease you may associate with potential death.
Death and dying is a topic avoided in the Western culture, even though it might be plastered across the news as happening…… it is happening to other people or in places far away. Children are largely shielded from it and kept away from the ritual of funerals. This is in contrast to many Eastern cultures who prepare for death as a part of their lives and who involve all members of the family in the passing of a loved one.
In the Tibetan Book of Living and Dying it says:
‘Even Buddha died. His death was a teaching, to shock the naive, the indolent, and complacent, to wake us up to the truth that everything is impermanent and death an inescapable fact of life.’
As he was approaching death, the Buddha said:

‘Of all footprints
That of the elephant is supreme;
Of all mindfulness meditations
That on death is supreme.’

Let’s talk about death

Death is a reminder to us then of the great impermanence of this life, but how does it indicate that life continues? It is helpful to look at the stories and beliefs surrounding death.
There is information given as reassurance of this fact by the spiritual teachings of every major world religion, in their own time and words, it is repeated through-out the ages.

Supporting the idea of life continuing are the documented case studies of people who have had near death experiences. How can so many books be written on this topic, documenting conversations around the globe of personal experiences…..if there is not some substance to it?
And while there are also people who are skeptics and non-believers, it is amazing how many of these same people at the time of impending death, or in great fear will say the words “O my God!’
It is as if our own spiritual being betrays the skeptic of our rational mind when all barriers have been broken.

How do you know death is not the end?

I have nursed patients during the final days of their life on a Radiotherapy ward. Night shift is when things are seen and heard that make you realise there is more to this life than we might think. People talk to relatives who have passed on years before. It happens in the last days, just before they die, or it happens the moment before they die. A look of recognition appears, a joyful look, a look of reunion with someone they love.
Death is accompanied on both sides: loved ones in this world who sit and hold their hand, and then it appears, greeted and helped by family who have come to welcome them to the next world.

Meeting those who have died

Many people have met their friend or relative who passed away in a dream or a vision. After my own father died, it was about a year later that I was in the middle of a dream. It had a dream-like quality to it, when suddenly walking through this dream in such incredible clarity that I would have said it was a physical waking experience, came my father. He looked young, as he would in the prime of his life. He was well dressed and held a book under his arm, walking somewhere as if he had an appointment. It was a purposeful walk. I cried out ‘Dad!’ in surprise and happiness. The instant I called his name, he stopped in his tracks, saw me and looked surprised. I rushed to him, hugged him and instantly woke up. It was as real as daylight, with no dream-like quality. The memory remains as clear as an experience during waking hours with none of the vagueness associated with dream remembrance. Could it be that in the dream state our soul is more likely to perceive glimpses of the next world?

Near-death experience

I have spoken to patients who have had the opportunity to have a near-death experience. (NDE)They may have had a cardiac arrest during an operation or in the Emergency Department and have been successfully resuscitated. I made a point of asking these patients if I saw it in their medical history, whether they had a NDE.
One or two said they remembered nothing, saw no light or angelic being. However I do remember some who said they had seen a bright light and felt very peaceful.
When my brother nearly passed away following a terrible accident, he said he felt an overwhelming sense of peace, it was so pleasant that he felt like he wanted to succumb and let go of this life. Just as he decided to do this, he heard a voice say with authority, ‘No, not yet, it is not your time…’
While scientists have put this down to a brain effect due to low oxygenation, they still can’t explain why so many of the people who have had a NDE can relate exact conversations and events in a resuscitation room while they were unconscious. They can’t explain why the experiences are so similar.

Why think about your death?

Buddha suggested we meditate on death to help us realise the impermanence of life, to release detachment from material possessions and develop a deeper understanding of the importance of love in our lives.

‘Researchers have noted that the NDE transforms people’s lives with a reduced fear and deeper acceptance of death, an increased concern for helping others…….a growing belief in a spiritual dimension and the spiritual meaning of life…..’

One woman said after her NDE:
‘I developed a great compassion for people that were ill and facing death, and I wanted so much to let them know, to somehow make them aware that the dying process was nothing more than an extension of one’s life…’

If you would like to read more about death, I have taken these quotes from the very well-known book: ‘The Tibetan Book of Living and Dying’ by Sogyal Rinpoche.
If fear is part of your feelings and thoughts of death, there is much in here to comfort you.