Coping with Christmas

Christmas is a very special time of year, but sometimes it brings a new level of stress to our lives. Illness or family issues don’t suddenly resolve for the festive season despite all the good wishes to have a Merry Christmas.  How do we manage it well?

Keeping it calm

It all starts in your mind, so in the lead-up to Christmas, keep it calm by using the techniques of mindfulness. It means that you bring yourself regularly to the place you are in, right at the moment. Witness it as an outside observer, seeing who you are, what you are doing, how you are doing it. Listen to your breathing and consciously take a deep breath telling your whole body to relax. It takes seconds to bring the stress levels down like this.

Use music when you just can’t turn off, for example:  ‘The Persistence of Memory’ by Graeme Koehne (Richard Mills and Tasmanian Symphony Orchestra)…. feel the angst melt.

Any tightness you are holding in your body will release while listening to the soundtrack from the movie ‘Ladies in Lavender’ featuring music by Joshua Bell.

If you like something a bit ethereal and unusual, listen to ‘Ik Ardas Wahe Guru’ from the White Sun ll album. Your energy will change.

Especially play this sort of music just as you are approaching bed-time….it will push all those busy thoughts away and you will find yourself sighing with relief.

Buying the magic

The shops and commercials we are bombarded with in the lead-up to Christmas might cause you to wonder if we actually have to buy the magic of Christmas. But that isn’t true, you don’t have to buy anything to have that special feeling.

The Christmas spirit is nothing to do with money or buying, it is purely spiritual and felt when we are together with the people we love, no matter where we are. The lovely thing about this time of year, is the amount of energy you are investing in thinking of others and the many good wishes you give out even to people you hardly know. It is in the many get togethers, the  catch-ups and the cards.

‘Merry Christmas’ is wishing you well.

Embracing angels

Christmas brings images of angels, elves, rosy cheeked Father Christmas, puddings dripping in yellow custard, sparkling tinsel covered trees and twinkling lights.

Expectations are high, we long for the magical and mystical in our lives, a memory of our childhood excitement….it is the antidote to work pressure and responsibilities that we carry daily. As you embrace the angels and the carols, the pageants and markets, be mindful of how much this life keeps us away from the ones we love, and find ways of participating in this time of year without allowing outside pressures or expectations to bring you down.

Beware of excess, don’t buy more and more presents for the children. Why do they need so many? You don’t need to buy the magic of Christmas. Turn the clock back, what does it look like? Do you remember particularly special presents? Quantity is not the magic of Christmas. Think about the values we are embracing and let them be angels, not gadgets.

Christmas Number Ones

Number One is eating together with the whole family and being with the people you love.

Number One is doing something for others, sharing what you have with those who are struggling or dealing with difficulties.

Number One is remembering what the spirit of Christmas is and carrying it forward into the New year.

Christmas Presents

What to buy! What to buy! Lists… family, children, grandchildren, friends!

My hairdresser told me today that this year, each month she bought one Christmas present, wrapped it and put it away through-out the year. She said it’s the most relaxing Christmas lead up she has ever had. Good advice!

If presents are more than you can bear for whatever reason, talk to your family.

If you have found yourself caught up in the bigger, better, best present scenario you may have created a rod for your own back. Don’t set up expectations in others that you feel burdened by now or in the future. If you feel yourself searching for something that is ‘good enough’ reset the whole experience. The ‘presents’ are not Christmas, they are a token of Christmas, keep it all in perspective and feel the pressure drop away.

Merry Christmas to all the Yellow Door Blog readers. Thank you to every one of you who has sent an email or added a comment to the blogs… your participation and feedback is very much appreciated, even if we cannot reply to everyone.

Whatever your own circumstances, may the spirit of Christmas prevail, and may the New Year be a fresh start and still carry a bit of magic for you all.

Erica Fotineas

December 2018